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What would you change?

There is a time machine in front of you right now! Imagine it as an old one like this, the steampunkness of it appeals to me, or a new fancy sci-fi type. In the air you can smell the heavy scent of possibility. If you step inside you get to set one date, you will be able to go back in your own life. Give yourself a pep talk and change the decisions that you will make. Would you take it? Would you go? Or could you walk away.

On twitter today I asked ” Do you regret more the things you did do or the things you didn’t”
It was interesting to see people responses. It was a mix actually. I then spoke to The Geek and being philosophical as ever he said it was pointless to regret anything. If carefully considered and made the best decision you could at the time with what you knew then you did your best. But he is not impulsive like me. I don’t always carefully consider anything. I am the typical embodiment of the saying “fools rush in where angels fear to tread”. Then he said if you don’t do something you don’t know how it would have been and so regret is again pointless

I had one conversation I had was about a single important regretted decision and faced with a time machine it would be very conflicting to decide what to do. It seems on one level easy to think that you would like to go back with what you know now and help yourself make a different decision. But that changes EVERYTHING, it changes who we are and who we become.

The hurt, even at its deepest, shapes who we become. Strength comes from enduring and character from making hard decisions.

For example I married the wrong person the first time, but without that I would not have my kids, but it is more than that, I would not have known I did not have them, if that makes sense. But there is so much more that it is taught me and moulded me that I think in myself I would be different. I would not have pink hair.

Things I do wish I could change involve hurting others. And at times I wish I could undo some of that. We are often selfish and we don’t always act thinking of others. But maybe it was part of their journey and lessons to learn.

To feel the really good, we have to be able to weather through the really bad. Otherwise we are just anesthetized and live through all experiences without really feeling them. The sadness that brings you to your knees and makes it hard to even breath, is balanced by the joy that makes your heart want to burst. If we undo the bad maybe we undo the good too.

So would you get into the time machine and go and do or undo something?

11 thoughts on “What would you change?

  1. Fantastic question, and… well. Think it would offer so much closure to anything that is regretted because it was/wasn’t done.

    Nope, knowing that changing anything in the past would change who I am, I’d have to pass on a trip down memory lane. Best bit is that it would finally have been a choice to not change anything other than simply having to accept it.

    Being able to go forward however… “will be an awfully big adventure”. ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. Forward would be a wonderful adventure, but that leads me to The Geek and my discussion on space travel and time distortion. But that is a blog post about 3 wishes yet to come.

  3. Well… time really (and I supposed even space) is relative, but to quote one of my favourite characters of all time:

    “To infinity, and beyond!”

  4. Tough one. the first thing that springs to mind is that i would never have moved to JHB, but then i would never had K2 and met some of my nearest and dearest friends. but i would have also been spared the most heartbreaking part of my life.

    i don’t know if i would do it or not. hmmmm.

  5. MeganTS your comment made me think of my favourite opera, “Beethovens Last Night”.

    It’s really well worth the read:

    In the story the devil comes to claim Beethovens soul… and eventually starts offering to take away his life’s pains. At each point Beethoven realises that without these his greatest moments may not have come to be.

    If you think about it, would any of us ever be as awesome today if yesterday had been any different? ๐Ÿ˜‰

  6. Mmmm, very interesting, really makes one think. There are some things that immediately comes to mind that I would go and do as well as not do, but all those things would lead me to not have my kids that I have, and I would not want a life without them.

    Then I thought if I could go back to just before my brother died, and wish that I could go back and talk more, but even while he was dying I was sitting next to him, and knew I would regret not saying something more important, but I just couldn’t think of something. I probably still wouldn’t be able to.

    Also, a bit less serious, very recently I had an opportunity to do something very exciting, but physically demanding at work. But I had to leave the kids somewhere for a few days, and I wasn’t comfortable with that, even though I knew I would regret not going. It ended up that I was sick in bed when the other people went, so it ended up being a good thing that I didn’t sign up.

  7. I will not go back and change anything. Changing things can result in the fact that I don’t have a family (me getting pregnant on a very young age).
    Also, I do regret some of the things I did in the past and if there is something I can do differently, then it is Finances. Most definitely, finances.

  8. I would change one thing lol. Back in the day I dated a real douche bag, needless to say it lasted a whole of 2 weeks but still I get the ibby jibbies when I think about it.

  9. I won’t change anything, because if I change anything things won’t be like it is today, even the very bad things.

  10. Very good question. A few years ago I would have said that I regretted job hopping so much in my career. Truth is, I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life. Today, I do and it’s taken me all those jobs and learning all those skills to discover this – so for that, I am glad.

    If anything, I’d probably want to go back in time and spend more time with family members who have passed away. Life is so precious, and I wish I’d made more of an effort when I was younger.

  11. I decided that the best would be like the choose your own adventures books. You get to try the one path and then you can go back and live a different option but you keep what you know about the other option and then you can have parallel options.

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