Oh boy does this meme showcase how much of a Non Completer Finisher I am. This link to the Belbin Team Roles chart will tell you what a completer finisher is if the name was not enough to give it away.
But Day 30 needs to be done so I can stop avoiding my blog and get on with other news
So a letter to myself. Sounded easy but I just deleted most of what I just wrote, I can not write this whole thing to myself and try as I might I kept just writing to you all about how I feel about me and where I am now. So sorry I am changing this. I am writing to you, to anyone who reads Pinky.
What I have learnt
Life is never ever going to be perfect but this has got to be close. Sure we could do with more money and less stress and more time etc etc but driving along the coastal road today watching the kite surfers and the beautiful Blaauberg conservation area, I was thinking how lucky I am that my normal driving around everyday is what people pay heaps of money to come and see on holiday.
I have realized looking back over the last year that it was a tough one, shew wee, but somehow I made it through and the other side is not a place. Worries do not disappear and everything is not just as you wanted, no it is real life, just as it was before. There are financial worries, parenting guilt, daily annoyances, in general normal life. But this place of comfort and happiness for lack of a better word is people. Those that surround us
Life continues to be what it was, the sun rises and sets and we are gifted 24 hours as always, but having been through a journey of discovery are and learning to be true to myself has lead to the most amazing people in my life. People who love me and who I love – now that is the place one wants to be. You soon see who the real supports are and who is willing to walk and stay even when they might not agree or when the going gets tough, These are the people the ones that make this place a good one to be in.
Yme is what I convinced myself did not exist in a man and that a relationship could never possibly feel this supportive or like a team effort. We fight, we are stubborn but above all what shines through is that we love each other and want to make this work. I am lucky to have him, I hope I never forget how special he is.
With this wonderful man came a family, I have the best ‘Almost-in-laws’ in the world. His family is amazing. They are kind welcoming and have just opened their arms to me and the Pinklets. They did not have to accept a strange pink haired woman with kids, but they did. And more than that, they did not just accept us they made us part of the family and really helped to make the transition to the Cape easier. They help to provide the family structure that the Pinklets need. Ouma Annatjie is very very special to them and me.
Andre: my guardian and true friend, you watch my back. I know that you will always be there and be around for me to talk to, with wise words and the perspective that my huge emotions often does not let me see. I would be lost without you. Thank you for all your help with the thousands of things and queries you help me with, but most thanks for just being there. You are another one that I count the Pinklets lucky to have in their life. Stable, strong characters for them to look up to and see admire. And besides I still think you have one of the best views ever!
Barbara: I miss you so much, the kids are 6, Earth Babies is 6, what a roller coaster of years. Thank you for walking them with me. Births, deaths, moves, divorces wow we have been through a lot in 6 years. Thank you for being you, never being afraid to say what you believe but always being willing to walk besides me no matter if it differs from what you think. Thank you for movie nights, Sunshine Cleaners and all the others. When you surprise visited here the other day it was amazing. You looked relaxed and happy. I still think you should come to the west coast 😉
My parents, they just support and love us no matter what and I could not do it without them. They have the Pinklets this week for a holiday and as much as I miss my kids deeply, I love how comfortable they are to fly off with my mom and visit Bumpa, Stanley, Peter, Christina and Kitty. These are the kind of grandparents every kids should have. My dad is not a man of many words but the other day I was moaning about something and he just said “Sally, where you are now and what you have is so much better, focus on that”
There are many more, Sharon who listened to many of my adventures and just shook her head and laughed, Elaine and Liz who have helped with Earth Babies, Scott and Karen for just being awesome friends. Suzanne, Shelly, Ilse and Jane a few of my babynet friends who have really stood by me. The twitter crowd who shares 140 character snippets of your life, and on the surface it is easy to think that these connections are just shallow and lacking but time and time again people show me how much they care. To everyone who reads and comments here, I am not sure you realize just how much it means to me and how much the support helped me through some very tough times.
It is life changing to realize the impact people can have on you. So I end by saying again, the perfect place to be is not a place, it is not circumstances and it is not unending blissful happiness it is knowing that you walk every step of the way with an army next to you of those who love and support you.