All in a nights confusion

I saw my good friend D last night. He has been very busy and is about to move and I wanted to catch up before he left. He did not really know what has been happening in my life as we have not seen each other in a long time. So my plan was to keep it light and fluffy and get him talking about his move and keep the focus off me.

Hahahaha well that worked well for about the first 10mins! There are just some people in life that without trying just know you very very well. We have a connection that stays strong no matter how long it has been since we last saw each other. D is supportive in a very different way to most people. If there was ever a brain I wanted to be in for a day (well maybe longer, I don’t think I would ever understand it in a day! – probably not even a lifetime) then it would be D’s. He has such a unique view on the world and a way of thinking and understanding things on such a practical (this is not the right word but I can’t think what is) level. (If you can think of what the word is D please let me know.)

Well I have a lot to think about as always after a chat with D. Like eating. Food and I are not friends at the moment. I just feel nauseous all the time. I am an emotional non-eater rather than eater. I can’t run to get rid of my stress at the moment ( 2 weeks to go!!!) so it stays inside and that is not pretty. But D said I need to get in touch with myself on a more Biological level – my body needs food. Dying is not an option so I have to somehow get over this. He does not discount ones emotions but he also does not just let you use them as an excuse for what he thinks is not beneficial behavior. So some eating has to happen.

Thanks for being in my life D it just would not be the same without you. Even though my poor brain is still trying to cope with some of what you said.

6 thoughts on “All in a nights confusion

  1. I also do not eat if I am unhappy. I always knew that when I met the right person I would put on weight and so it has proved to be. Comfort starving is a bit miserable really isn’t it? Trying little and often sometimes worked for me but other times my throat just closed up. Good luck getting through this.

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