So I was having a discussion with Barbara about the number of sexual partners I have had in my life time and that now being single this number is probably going to grow. It is really not a big deal to me. I know that if a future partner ever asks you are supposed to lie lie deny but really is it that important? They say men add a few to their number and women take off a few. Still shows how it is more okay in our society for men to have been with more women than visa versa.
Today Barbara sent me a poll about Notches in the bed post from a parenting forum and maybe I just need to make myself feel better but surely the biggest group are not those with 3 partner or less?
How many notches would appear on your bedpost?
0 – 3 42% [ 28 ]
4 – 6 18% [ 12 ]
7 – 10 11% [ 7 ]
11 – 15 12% [ 8 ]
16 – 20 3% [ 2 ]
21 – 25 3% [ 2 ]
26 – 30 0% [ 0 ]
31 – 35 2% [ 1 ]
36 – 40 0% [ 0 ]
40 and over 9% [ 6 ]
I decided to conduct my own little poll and lets see how the results compare. Guy please vote so we can get a better idea of the true average as I don’t think it should matter if you are a guy or girl.
And then lastly does the number matter?
The number matters if you decide it matters…or if your partner had decided it is and is getting a knife.
Eeek, sorry, few errors in that comment. Got distracted :/
It used to matter to me, but now that I’m in a stable relationship I don’t care anymore…it doesn’t matter to me, as long as the number doesn’t grow anymore!
Could have been interesting to differentiate between the sexes…
Goblin – I think if people do ask each other this they must be prepared for the answer and realize that you can’t un-know something.
Kyra- that was what i thought until I seperated from my husband and now am in the process of divorce
Yme – I know but I wanted a general one, maybe next time
I am not one for counting.. in fact I plead the fifth if asked cos it is no-ones business but mine and my guava’s..
And if the questions persist I will thumbsuck a ghastly figure like 278 but thats only the ones I could “o” face with..
Its not how many people you pomp.. but more of how many different techniques you could master along the way
P.S. Where is the Subscribe to comments??
I am in the under 3 marker and happy with that – it is due to choice.
My husband has had more – I do want to know the number but not the details of where, when, how and why.
The number is important for me 1. from a safety perspective, 2. for me I suppose it also tells me something about the person – I know people dont like hearing that but it is simply one of those things in life to some it does matter.
I do not think it matters how much sexual partners one had although my hubby do think it matters but still when he asked, I was brutally honest in how many sexual partners I had.
Bridget – I am with you on all that matters is techniques learned along the way
Barbara – so at what number are you not going to talk to me?
zola – how did he respond?
Nah the number never stops me talking to you, just sleeping with you Ü
I suppose it should’t matter in today’s society but it does matter to me. I agree with Barbara that if I’m involved (romantically) with someone then I need to know his ‘history’ because it does reveal something of their character and their values. What my friends do is entirely up to them, I won’t judge or condemn, but I probably won’t ‘join the party’ either.
Barbara & Sharon so what number rules me out of a Ménage à trois with you guys?
I have voted but I am saying nothing! :-p
I think that it doesn’t matter. I really don’t care how many partners my partner has had and quite frankly I don’t think that it is any of his business how many partners I’ve had. I would never ask a question like that and I would never answer a question like that because, as I’ve just pointed out, it’s irrelevant. I am only interested in whether they always practice safe sex. More than that I don’t need to know.
i spoiled my ballot paper
I think it is relevant having an idea of how many, exact figures aren’t important. I’m probably more concerned about the nature of the encounters, i.e. serious or flings. But I agree, it’s never worth asking for more details or placing too much emphasis on it, because curiosity can eat at you and ultimately destroy a relationship…
i don’t really want to know how many partners my partners has had. But, I came across this video on youtube today while I was doing research for work
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FhKo0jn5M7I
made me think about what the notches on a bedpost could mean.
Well my Dh has had 3 – including me. I have had substantially more. It makes me feel yuck knowing I am easier than him hahaha. But also glad that he isn´t easy
Sounds warped, I know. I don´t think numbers makes a MAJOR difference. I had to know, and he had to be honest – honesty is all that counts.
when I am actually able to say Ménage à trois correctly then I will be ‘old’ enough to have one – but since I cannot pronounce trait properly either I think we are all safe from that hahaha
Laura – you and me both
Julia – thing is I have been asked before, if people ask they must be prepared to know.
Clarence – hahaha sorry it was not more specific after 50+
Yme – why would knowing have any impact at all, details sure, but just a number how can that destroy a relationship?
Damaria – i know it is scary, I found this http://calculators.lloydspharmacy.com/sexdegrees/ shows you the number of indirect sexual partners you have had
Cazpi – does a higher number make you easy? As long as you are good together I can’t see why it matters either way
Barbara – sure we can find you an on line pronunciation
I’ve had just over 10, and I’m very happy. It’s not enough to make me a slut and it’s not too few to make me think I “haven’t lived”